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Shaken, Never Stirred

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Posts : 14
Join date : 2013-05-18

PostSubject: Liquid Confidence   Mon May 20, 2013 11:06 pm

The scene opens up with a man holding a camera walking into a building. You do not see the man and only see the first person view given by his camera. Once in the building, he walks up to the front counter. Behind the front counter is a gorgeous girl whose nametag reads Bethany. Behind Bethany, on the wall, was an official NWF logo. The cameraman clears his throat and says…

::Cameraman::
“Hi.. I’m going in now.”


The camera sways to the door to the right of the counter as Bethany can be heard telling the cameraman that he does not have access to go through the door. The cameraman pays no mind and swings the door open. He walks through the door to proceed down a hall. You can hear the receptionist following behind the man, as the camera focuses on a door at the end of a hall. In the background, you can hear Bethany calling for security…

::Bethany::
“Hello? Security?! We got a man trying to break into the offices. He is a tall man with bleach blonde and black hair. Please come help!”


The man gets to the end of the hallway, and, with camera in hand, walks into the room. On the other side of the door, there was a meeting being held with all the head-honchos of New-Era Wrestling Federation. A man in a suit stands up and points at the man…

::Head of Management::
“Who the hell is this, Bethany?!”


::Bethany::
“I’m sorry! He just walked right in!”


As Bethany attempts to explain why there is a man in a very serious meeting, the cameraman walks over to a side table, and places the camera on it, so that the entire room was visible and audible. As the man walks away from the camera, it is revealed that the cameraman is none other than “Shaken, Never Stirred” Nathaniel Paradise. Paradise walks from the camera to an open seat, where he sits and kicks his feet up on the long table in the middle of the room. He looks over at the head of management and begins to speak…

::Nathaniel Paradise::
“Hello, sir. My name is Nathaniel Paradise. I’m not sure if you knew that. Then again, I actually knew that you didn’t know that. If you knew of me other than a name and a couple of pictures, you obviously wouldn’t have me in a tag-team match for my debut on your show. But, hey! That’s okay. I’m not going to complain about opportunities given to me. All I am going to do is address the opportunities that you gentlemen, as management, may have missed.”


At this time, two security guards walk into the room. One looks like a fat pitbull and is equally as angry as an angry pitbull would be if he was also fat. The other was a built Mexican fellow with a long black mullet, puffed 80’s style. Once Nathaniel notices this, he points at them and asks…

::Nathaniel Paradise::
“Oh wow! How long have the Steiner Brothers circa 1990 worked here? I knew you guys could book the Dog-Face Gremlin, but Big Papi Pump too? Damn.”


The guards, not letting childish comments get the better of them, look to the head of management and ask…

::Security Guard #1::
“Do you want us to get this guy out of here, sir?”


::Head of Management::
“Not yet. I want to see where he is going with this.”


Nathaniel reaches into his jacket and pulls out a flask and opens it up. He raises it up…

::Nathaniel Paradise::
“Cheers.”


Nathaniel puts the flask to his mouth and takes a drink. As he takes that drink, a man in the corner… ohhhh let’s call him Bill… Bill says…

::Bill::
“Hey! There’s no drinking in here! This is a dry..”


::Nathaniel Paradise::
“With all due respect, if you put me in a tag match against Johnny Nobody 1 and Johnny Nobody 2, you better allow me to have my liquid personality whenever I damn well please. Plus, I don’t give a damn if you don’t drink. That’s just more for your cash cow for the next decade to enjoy.”


Paradise takes another drink and quickly begins to talk…

::Nathaniel Paradise::
“Seriously. Where do you guys find these people? Justin Studd? Helmsly? Do you have an underwhelming wrestler cloning machine in these offices somewhere? Did you find the DNA of Stevie Richards and couldn’t help creating an army of mid-card talents? Maybe one day you can get ahold of D’Lo Brown and start making them in black. All of these cookie-cutter cats that show me nothing but a lack of desire and a coupon from the tanning salon for spending 60+ hours there each week. But luckily, you guys have hired yourselves a regular garbage man. I’ll take out the trash for you guys. Don’t worry. Me and that Asian guy you guys have me teaming with will take out the oracles of just okay. I'm never the one to over look an opponent, but in this case, I could beat both of them with my drinking hand tied behind my back. Justin Studd and SDH will both get hammered this Wednesday. And once they and the rest of the world get a sweet sip of the Rum & Choke, nothing will ever be the same around here again.”


Nathaniel drinks the rest of the liquid in the flask and puts it back in his jacket. He stands and walks over to the camera and picks it up. As he walks out, he grabs Bethany on the ass. She sighs in disgust as the Alcoholic All-Star leaves the building while making a statement to management that he refuses to be over looked.

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